bigger pond

Archive for September, 2008

Puritan Ghosts

Monday, September 15th, 2008

Sometimes it frightens me that I — in some mutant embodiment of the “Puritan work ethic” — seriously consider emotional and physical burn-out to be a viable option for dealing with a crisis. It’s right there, on the table next to wiser choices such as “seek professional counsel” and “stop trying to control the outcome of someone else’s life.” I can’t explain why it’s such an attractive option at the outset, but I am slowly recognizing just how diametrically opposed my choice of burn-out is to true incarnational living.

The Fun We Forget

Saturday, September 6th, 2008

I married off two siblings this summer, resulting in more people that I love becoming permanent fixtures in my life. While each of their weddings were lovely, I was most excited — not about the flowers, fanciness, or even the family gathering — but about everything that would happen after those six hours of vows, photographs, and other assorted trappings.

Paigey, Corinne, and I all grew up in Christian homes. We were all taught from the time we were little that marriage is a solemn endeavor. By the time we were in junior high and high school, a kind of healthy fear had been instilled in us of romantic relationships. We were acutely aware that marriage, mirroring the bond of Christ and the church, was hard work. That it would reveal our sin. That it would hurt us. That it would involve more tough “hanging on” than easy “being in love.” It’s a strange and somber state of mind that, I think, usually only occurs in those of us who have been raised in the church.

And I’m glad I was taught well. But, as I told each of my sweet sisters prior to their wedding days, these sober truths are far from the whole story. Sometimes, in the midst of our cautious ponderings, we forget a rather key aspect of marriage.

It’s also a lot of fun. Delightful, joyful fun.

Even the part where you’re hanging on.